|
President Trump has 8
Really! Donald said "JizWOW's are better than the border wall." |
For God sake, Save a tube-socks life!
Authentic and original reviews.
I know we didn't get an impersonator.
I know we didn't get an impersonator.
Snoop
Gollum
|
Morgan Freeman
Gilbert Gottfried
|
JIZWOW authentic and official
$19.97
Perfect for the after "bath" clean-up. Make no bones about it, there is only 1 JIZWOW.
Covering yourself with love juice can be daunting to clean up. Not any more!
When you feel the soft and supple nature of the all new JIZWOW, and how highly absorbent the Official JIZWOW is, you will be amazed and smitten. Most likely geting dozens for your friends.
Check it out for yourself or give one to a friend. The Jizwow, shooting a smile on your face.
March is BOGO.
Buy one Get one FREE!
Buy 2 get 2 FREE
FREE shipping and handling.
Covering yourself with love juice can be daunting to clean up. Not any more!
When you feel the soft and supple nature of the all new JIZWOW, and how highly absorbent the Official JIZWOW is, you will be amazed and smitten. Most likely geting dozens for your friends.
Check it out for yourself or give one to a friend. The Jizwow, shooting a smile on your face.
March is BOGO.
Buy one Get one FREE!
Buy 2 get 2 FREE
FREE shipping and handling.
2 JIZWOW's authentic and official
$29.97
This is for 2 JIZWOW's
Perfect for the after "bath" clean-up. Make no bones about it, there is only 1 JIZWOW.
Covering yourself with love juice can be daunting to clean up. Not any more!
When you feel the soft and supple nature of the all new JIZWOW, and how highly absorbent the Official JIZWOW is, you will be amazed and smitten. Most likely geting dozens for your friends.
Check it out for yourself or give one to a friend. The Jizwow, putting the smile on your face.
March is BOGO.
Buy one Get one FREE!
Buy 2 get 2 FREE
FREE shipping and handling.
Perfect for the after "bath" clean-up. Make no bones about it, there is only 1 JIZWOW.
Covering yourself with love juice can be daunting to clean up. Not any more!
When you feel the soft and supple nature of the all new JIZWOW, and how highly absorbent the Official JIZWOW is, you will be amazed and smitten. Most likely geting dozens for your friends.
Check it out for yourself or give one to a friend. The Jizwow, putting the smile on your face.
March is BOGO.
Buy one Get one FREE!
Buy 2 get 2 FREE
FREE shipping and handling.
12 Perfect presents for everyone in the party
$119.97
Have a bachelor or bachlorette party? Need that perfect gift.
Well they shore as hell aren't thinking of this and thats why all your friends will be so surprised.
Fights have broken out over who gets to keep the perfect present.
Act now and get the authentic JIZWOW at this special price for all of your friends and mother-in-laws.
When you feel the soft and supple nature of the all new JIZWOW, and how highly absorbent the Official JIZWOW is, you will be amazed and smitten. Most likely geting dozens for your friends.
Check it out for yourself or give one to a friend. The Jizwow, putting the smile on your face.
March is BOGO.
Buy 12 get 6 for FREE!
You get a total of 18.
FREE shipping and handling.
Well they shore as hell aren't thinking of this and thats why all your friends will be so surprised.
Fights have broken out over who gets to keep the perfect present.
Act now and get the authentic JIZWOW at this special price for all of your friends and mother-in-laws.
When you feel the soft and supple nature of the all new JIZWOW, and how highly absorbent the Official JIZWOW is, you will be amazed and smitten. Most likely geting dozens for your friends.
Check it out for yourself or give one to a friend. The Jizwow, putting the smile on your face.
March is BOGO.
Buy 12 get 6 for FREE!
You get a total of 18.
FREE shipping and handling.
Wholesale 24 JIZWOW's authentic and official
$480.00
$249.00
This is for 24 JIZWOW's packed to sell.
Perfect for the after "bath" clean-up. Make no bones about it, there is only 1 JIZWOW.
Covering yourself with love juice can be daunting to clean up. Not any more!
When you feel the soft and supple nature of the all new JIZWOW, and how highly absorbent the Official JIZWOW is, you will be amazed and smitten. Most likely getting dozens for your friends.
Each authentic JIZWOW comes with a grommet in the upper corner for easy access and storage.
Check it out for yourself or give one to a friend. The Jizwow, putting the smile on your face.
FREE shipping and handling.
Perfect for the after "bath" clean-up. Make no bones about it, there is only 1 JIZWOW.
Covering yourself with love juice can be daunting to clean up. Not any more!
When you feel the soft and supple nature of the all new JIZWOW, and how highly absorbent the Official JIZWOW is, you will be amazed and smitten. Most likely getting dozens for your friends.
Each authentic JIZWOW comes with a grommet in the upper corner for easy access and storage.
Check it out for yourself or give one to a friend. The Jizwow, putting the smile on your face.
FREE shipping and handling.
Marketing in England
Clean up is half the fun.
Frequently asked questions:
1. What is a cum towel?
A cum towel is a towel specifically for removing cum off a persons body. Great question!
2. Whats so special about the JizWow towel?
First and foremost, it makes you laugh & smile. Smiling is good for you. Then:
3. Has a JizWow ever killed anyone?
Yes! It would be better if you never brought that up again. Just sayin.
4. Can I name my JizWow?
Absolutely. when your JizWow's goes out for a walk how will they know when to cum back?
5. If I want to join the mile high club is it OK to bring JizWow on a plane?
Yes, just make sure when you are going through the security check you let the TSA agents know you have your JizWow with you. I would hold it up high and proud and yell on the top of your lungs: "I HAVE A JIZWOW ON ME". Security will leave you alone after that.
1. What is a cum towel?
A cum towel is a towel specifically for removing cum off a persons body. Great question!
2. Whats so special about the JizWow towel?
First and foremost, it makes you laugh & smile. Smiling is good for you. Then:
- It is the perfect size unless you are using it for elephant cum. (You will need the upgraded "The Rock" beach towel.)
- They are bright and elegant. Wonderful for placing in the second bathroom for guests to use.
- They wash really easy.
- They are made out of virgin sheep, so every time you use it, you can feel like you just took the cherry from a sheep. or was it goat wool? what ever.
- Have you ever cum in a tube sock? Your sock is screwed and you will never get the cum out. Jizwow's are so much better.
- Nobody will ever steel your cum towel again.
- A perfect size to bring out to parties and diners. Can you imagine how proud your friends and family will be seeing you are the pinnacle of style?
- Makes the best white elephant gift.
- Perfect for bringing to a acquaintances house and putting it in their kitchen, bathroom....you get the idea.
3. Has a JizWow ever killed anyone?
Yes! It would be better if you never brought that up again. Just sayin.
4. Can I name my JizWow?
Absolutely. when your JizWow's goes out for a walk how will they know when to cum back?
5. If I want to join the mile high club is it OK to bring JizWow on a plane?
Yes, just make sure when you are going through the security check you let the TSA agents know you have your JizWow with you. I would hold it up high and proud and yell on the top of your lungs: "I HAVE A JIZWOW ON ME". Security will leave you alone after that.
These may or may not be actual quotes. These may be pictures snapped up off the web and quotes placed next to said photos. On the other hand, these may be from someone who heard a rumor, from a friend or a distant cousin, that once knew a long lost relative who may or may not have been in a coma for 2 years and heard these quotes first hand. Either way we are sure that in some alternate universe they may be real. Anyway, we will swear on a stack of bibles to the authenticity that these are actual words on a website!
Think about this:
- Over 83% of better homes have at least 1.
- Donald Trump buys them by the case.
- Nancy Pelosi has it on her talking points.
- Stops the spread of STD's.
- Cures Cancer.
- Help prevent global warming.
- Cums in 3 colors.
- Plays well with others.
- Makes friends cry.
- We will send it to anyone you wish.
- COMES IN A CLEAR PLASTIC BAG IF YOU CHOOSE.
- Will guarantee to make your penis or titties 2, 3 even 4 times bigger!
- Is recommended by top celebrities.
- 4 out of 5 dentists recommend it.
- Gets over 100 miles to the gallon.
- USDA certified.
- Has won 6 Grammys.
- Played across from Merril Streep and PeeWee Herman.
- Made from only endangered species that specifically sacrificed themselves.
- Endorsed by the Democratic, Republican, Independent, Communist, Socialist, Fascist, Totalitarian, and Nazi partys.
- Performs Exorcisms.
- Raises people from the dead.
- Great with pets.
- Perfect to write a bank robbery note on.
- Fantastic to loan to friends, washed or used.
- Speaks 5 languages (Including the Language of love.. hehehe)
- Repairs broken bones.
- Cures baldness or causes it (Whichever one you wish)
- Answers Prayers.
- Talks directly to G-D.
- Perfect for show and tell at school.
- Cleveland steamers?..... No Problem!
- Prevents assassinations.
- Makes people 3 to 4 times better looking
- Doubles as an invisibility cloak.
- Rings out fresh like new.
- Homos can use it.
- Lesbian too.
- Blessed by 8 religions. Catholicism, Judaism, Islamism, Hinduism, Buddism, Jizismism, Buttmunchism, (Spiritualism-Like that's a real thing).
- Atheist approved. (Really they don't really give a shit)
- Defends against evil.
- Vegetarian, except when it eats meat, fish, chicken or baby seals.
- Circumcised. (It started out as a beach blanket)
- Buy them by the case for resale.
- Throws outrageous parties.
- Doesn't do drugs.
- Has furry hand-cuffs
- Runs naked down streets.
- Watches lots of Rick and Morty.
- Brazilians (Always smooth)
- Never snitches.
- Certified & Approved by: Hells Angles, The Crips & Bloods, White Nationalists, KKK, The Triad, Yakuza, MS 13, Warlocks. Mongols, Gambino Crime Family, Mafia, The Russian Mafia, The Polish mafia (Polish mafia? they can't even screw in a light bulb.), Nacho libre', Bendejos, Trial lawyers association, NAPO, Senate, House of Representatives, The Red Cross, Habitat for Humanity, Death Row Records, Mickey Mouse Club, NRA,
- Comes with this list of GUARANTEED things it does.
- I did say GUARANTEED!!!
- A party is just not a party without JizWow.
- Get yours now while supplies last
Seriously: Part of every purchase goes to stopping and awareness of Child psychological abuse.